Today marks the 5th anniversary of my very first post on Cynical Dad, an ode to my daughter's mispronunciation of chicken fingers. She was a preschooler at the time. My son wasn't even six months old. Today? She's a rising third grader and he's entering a K-2 program this fall.
This is also the 1,000th post on Cynical Dad. Crazy, huh?
I'd like to thank everyone who's ever read a word I've written. I don't know why you do it, but I truly appreciate it.
Thanks for coming along on the ride! Hope you've enjoyed it!
Showing posts with label Meta. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Meta. Show all posts
M + V
Scheming
I'm going to be taking the rest of the week off.
In the meantime, I'm working on a project. A new site. And I'm looking for people to join me.
If you are between the ages of 35-45, funny, and would like to write for me with me, drop me a line.
Self-Love Day
It's Self-Love Day!
I participated two years ago, but last year I was busy showering a redneck.
Anyway, Self-Love Day was created by Hilly at Snackiepoo as an alternative to Valentine's Day, a day when each participant could yell to the world something he loved about himself. Or if not the world, the few people that stumbled across his blog. And then his friends and readers were supposed to share something they loved about that person.
Truth: I am normally a negative, insecure person. I don't really love anything about myself. But this year is different. This year, I am quite proud of the difference I have made in my community. I have helped many families and have seen firsthand the difference my contributions have made.
So now it's your turn. You're supposed to share something you love about me. And don't be shy! Feel free to tell me you LOVE how hot my ass looks in these jeans!
Let's Talk About Sexy
Guess where I am today? I'm part of the Mominatrix's Valentine's Day Gift Guide!
Actually, that sentence makes it sound like you can purchase me as a Valentine's Day gift.
You can't.
Sorry, folks.
Anyway, she asked a bunch of us dads what we found sexy.
Curious?
Sometimes I Forget
Quick! What has two thumbs and should probably tell people he's going to do something before he starts doing it? This guy!
Bonus joke: What has two thumbs and never gets tired of this joke? This guy!
But back to the first joke. I'm doing NaBloPoMo again this year. I just forgot to mention it. I've done it every year, so it's pretty much part of this site.
What does that mean to you? You'll get approximately 50% more posts from me this month.
And probably some filler.
Like this post.
Nothing To See Here
I'm over at DadCentric today for Alumni Week. In my post, I give mommybloggers some unsolicited advice.
What can I say? I'm a giver.
Your Prayers Have Been Answered!
You can now follow me on Facebook!
You can also follow my blog on Facebook!
And I have no idea why you'd want to do either!
Or why I'm doing this in the first place!
Other than all the cool kids seem to be doing it.
Four
Four years ago today, I started this site (I still refuse to refer to it as a blog (most of the time, at least)). It started off as a site about life with the kids and being a stay-at-home dad. Some 830+ posts later, it's morphed into something else. I write about music (a lot). I started my Nameless Twitter Radio Show. I started posting pictures of weird things. Every once in a while, I write something funny (but you'll have to look hard and dig deep to find an example) or interesting (even harder to find).
The funny thing is my site was offline for about twenty-six hours before this. I think the Internet Gods were trying to tell me to hang it up.
But screw them! They'll have to wait until February, when I turn 40.
Anyway, I'd like to thank anyone who has ever taken the time to come here and read even a word of my ramblings (except for the pedophiles using Google to feed their habits). I truly appreciate it.
Thanks so much for coming along for the ride!
But before I go and raise a Yuengling, I thought I'd share the two most common misconceptions about me/Cynical Dad:
- I live in New York City.
- I am Asian.
Review: Social Skill Builder's My Community
I had a chance to review Social Skill Builder's My Community, a program designed to improve a child's social skills, for The Parent Bloggers Network. If you would like to know what I thought about this software title, please click here to read my review.
04.01
If you've been reading my site for a bit and came here today looking for an April Fools' Day post, leave now. You'll be disappointed if you stay.
More than usual, even.
For the past two years, I have run April Fools' Day jokes on my site. In 2007, I wrote a post stating I had a CD of children's music coming out. For some reason, people believed it.
Because I knew people would be looking for something similar, I started my April Fools' Day joke a few days early in 2008. I wrote a three-part post about an ex-girlfriend who called off our engagement. I felt a little bad about this one as people were feeling sorry for me until they came to the end.
I knew there was no way I could top last year's stunt, so I'm sitting this one out. I thought about faking my own death and even went so far as to create an obituary, but I decided against it when I realized people would be disappointed when they found out I was actually alive.
Be careful out there today. Don't believe anything you read.
Book Club
I put a few titles up in the far-right sidebar. It shows the books I'm currently reading as well as the ones I've recently read that I would receommend to others. As always, if you have any book suggestions, let me know.
Inspire Me
I got nothing.
Help a brother out.
Give me something to write about.
Ask me a question.
Surely there's something I haven't covered in the past 3.5 years.
Want To Be A DJ?
The auction that benefits the Border View YMCA ends in just a matter of days! If you haven't checked it out, here are some of the items you can bid on:
- A dinner date with MetroDad.
- An oil painting by the world-renowned artist, Whit Honea.
- 15 pounds of cookies from Bite My Cookie (I've had these and they're delicious!).
- An autographed copy of Rockabye and a link on her website from Girl's Gone Child.
- A Mets game with Looky, Daddy!
- A month of advertising on Attack Of The Redneck Mommy.
- A month of advertising on Sarah And The Goon Squad.
- A month of advertising on Busy Mom.
- A set of Monster Turbine In-Ear speakers from A Family Runs Through It.
- A Flip Mino camcorder.
- A pass for the 2009 BlogHer Conference.
- Dinner with Shamu and passes to Sea World, San Diego.
- Round-trip airfare to Ft. Lauderdale and a five-day cruise to Jamaica and Grand Cayman. The coolest part? Queensryche, Tesla, Skid Row, and some other bands will be performing on this cruise. Rock!
- And more!
So what the hell are you waiting for? To bid on my auction, click here. To bid on the other auctions, click here.
Stupid Computer
My laptop is failing. My battery conked out months ago (it'll only hold a charge for 30 minutes or so). Earlier this week, my AC adapter started shorting out. A few days ago, it totally stopped working.
I am currently using a loaner adapter which is probably going to fry my computer (it's 65W, my laptop needs 90W). But you know what pisses me off the most about all this?
I DID NOT POST YESTERDAY.
Yeah, I realize no one missed me. Some of you might have been thankful for the breather. But I had been blogging every day since November 1st. I had posted for 124 days in a row. And while not every (or any) post was of high quality, I was still proud of that little streak.
My streak is dead. Just like my stupid AC adapter.
DAMN YOU, DELL!
Humor
When the funniest thing you've written in weeks
turns out to be a typo
maybe it's time to take a break for a little while.
P.S. You really need to check out that song.
My Weekend With Twitter
Over the weekend, I made the decision to try to be less of a prick when it comes to Twitter, so I followed everyone who follows me unless they were trying to sell me something.
As I was looking through the list of people that follow me, I found three people that follow only me and no one else, which is more than just a little bit freaky. You know what this means, don't you?
They're droids sent from the future to destroy me!
Or the government is keeping tabs on me. AGAIN!
As a result, I have to be a little more selective on what I say on Twitter. For now on, only read every third word of each tweet. It'll be our secret code, ok?
SUCK IT, DROIDS/GOVERNMENT AGENTS!
AND DON'T FORGET
I'm planning the roast of FADKOG from …For A Different Kind Of Girl. If you're interested in joining the fun, leave your name in the comments of this post.
Announcements
My Four Cents
I have finally started my own review blog, My Four Cents: Because My Opinion Is Worth Twice As Much As Yours. I kick things off with a review of DreamBox Learning K-2 Math.Mark Your Calendar
Remember folks, Tuesday is Cynical Dad Day! Some people have already started celebrating. What are you waiting for?Nameless Twitter Radio Show
This week's radio show will be on Monday (tonight!). The theme will be songs that mention bands or musicians.Song Of The Day
On December 23, 2006, I began adding a Song Of The Day to every post. On January 31, 2009, it came to an end. During that time, I posted (with the assistance of others) 431 songs. I try to keep my archived song list as up-to-date as possible. But YouTube keeps pulling videos, so most of those links are no longer valid.I may bring it back if things change over at YouTube, but for now, the feature is dead.
Broken
This site is broken. I think I pissed off the Internet Gods or something. Or maybe the Gods Of Good Taste are trying to tell me something.
When I try to view my site, it sometimes takes at least fifteen seconds to connect to my site (not load my site, CONNECT to my site).
Most of the time, my feed is about two posts behind my actual site (and yes, I've tried pinging it).The company I used to use for commenting was bought out by another company and now I can't get the new commenting system to do what I want (like post people's URLs). At least one problem is solved! Your URL will now show up when you leave a comment.
I'm about ready to throw the whole damn thing into the trash bin.
Song of the day: Twist Barbie by Shonen Knife
2008: The Year In Review
Since I'm an arrogant asshole, I thought I'd list my favorite posts for each month of 2008. What? You were expecting me to list the best albums, movies, or news events of 2008? You must have mistaken me for someone who has a life!
January
To Foolishly Go Where Few Men Have Gone Before
I become a Daisy Scout Troop Leader for a night.
February
How Dr. Seuss Screwed Up My Life
A cynical look at the works of Dr. Seuss.
March
The Broken Engagement
A three-part story about a girl who broke my heart and how I got my revenge.
April
What's Grosser Than Gross? This.
I die at a petting zoo.
May
Live Blogging The 2008 Scripps National Spelling Bee
I blogged several events with Motherbumper, but this was my favorite. Let's do it again this year, Katie!
June
Terror At The Lazy 5 Ranch
Photographs of the animals that tried to kill us at a drive-thru animal park.
July
How Professional Wrestling Destroyed My Dream Job
Why I hate Ric Flair.
August
God Is A Marketing Genius
I discover God's plan for filling the pews on Sundays.
September
The Genesis Of A Pseudonym
How I came up with Chag.
October
How Larry Flynt Tried To Make Me His Sex Slave
I get propositioned in my front yard.
November
Um, yeah. Despite the fact that I posted every day in November, I didn't post anything worthy of being highlighted. So move along. Nothing to see here.
December
Tie: The Christmas Gift and He Said
Both of these posts deal with my son's development.
Song of the day: Becky by Be Your Own Pet
Measuring My Worth
Some believe a blog's worth is measured by how much money it makes.
Some believe a blog's worth is measured by how many subscribers it has.
Some believe a blog's worth is measured by how many awards it receives.
Some believe a blog's worth is measured by how many incoming links it has.
Danny from Dad Gone Mad believes a blog's worth is measured by the number of comments it receives. He has asked everyone to comment on as many blogs as possible for the rest of December.
Personally, I believe there's only way to ascertain a blog's true worth: by the number of topless photos of readers the owner receives. And I've been feeling mighty unworthy lately.
Song of the day: Let It Snow by Luscious Jackson
