It's time for another exciting installment of Porn or Toddlerspeak. The following phrase was heard in the Cynical Dad household on Friday evening. Your mission is to decide whether the phrase came from my three-year-old daughter or from a three-year-old porno DVD.
Phrase
"I want that big pecker."
AnswerTrick question. This was actually something Ella said to me as we were headed to bed. Toddlerspeak. We were all sitting at the kitchen table, eating birthday cake. After I picked my jaw off the floor, I scanned the table to determine what she desired.
I held up a fork. "Is this what you want?"
"Yes."
"What is this?"
"A fork."
"Then why are you calling it a big pecker?"
She only smiled and gave me a look that said Because I'm trying to kill you. Happy Birthday, Daddy.
TODAY, MY DAUGHTER BECAME A WOMAN
Zoey put a headband in her hair and admired her reflection in the mirror."This thing gives me a headache. But I look good."
Only three years old and she's already discovered the following relationship: Fashion > Comfort.
GHS: 4 (because no father should have to hear the words "I want that big pecker" come from his daughter's lips)
Click here for the previous Porn or Toddlerspeak.
