Yesterday, Karen, an Imperfect Parent colleague and former Babble colleague (apparently, I'm following her around everywhere), asked me if Chag was an acronym for something.
If my site had a FAQ section, "Is Chag your real name? Is it a nickname? Does it mean something?" would be right near the top. In fact, that line of questioning would be second only to "Why the hell hasn't your wife left you yet?"
When people ask me what Chag means, I tell them. It's no big secret. But for some reason, I've never discussed it here. Basically, it's my initials and my wife's initials mashed together to form one sexy little acronym.
Pretty lame, no?
When I started this site, I wanted to be fairly anonymous. Ella picked her own alias and I chose the kids' aliases. But I had trouble finding a nom de plume for myself. I wanted something unusual. And then one day, Chag emerged from the deep recesses of my memory.
Because there was a time when I had big plans for Chag.
When Ella and I ran our little flea market booth, we would often come across odd things at yard sales. One day, Ella brought home a bagful of zippers.
Me: What the hell are we supposed to do with these?
Ella: Sell them.
Me: Who's going to buy a bag of zippers?
Ella: I did.
Me: Then let's hope there's another Ella out there.
But after a few days, I had an idea. I knew what to do with the zippers!
Maybe it was all the parachute pants and bondage pants I wore was exposed to in the '80s, but I decided to make a zipper shirt.
Ella: A what?
Me: A zipper shirt.
Ella: You're going to sew a bunch of zippers on a shirt?
Me: No, I'm going to sew all the zippers together to form a shirt.
Ella: But you don't even know how to sew!
Me: It's just needle and thread. How hard can it be?
Despite the fact that it would probably be uncomfortable as hell and weigh twenty pounds (but it would probably stop a bullet!), I though a zipper shirt was a cool idea. I drew pictures of the prototype. But instead of learning how to sew, I drew pictures of other fashion creations. And then I came up with the name of the company: CHAG.
I could see the CHAG name up there alongside Betsey Johnson and Vivienne Westwood. I started making mockups of the CHAG label. I knew some people cared more about the label than the actual article of clothing, so I was determined to make the CHAG label as cool as possible. Talk about putting the cart before the horse.
Eventually, I moved on to other schemes and dreams. A few years later, I came across the bag of zippers when we were cleaning out the garage. I held it fondly for a few seconds, thinking about the zipper shirt and CHAG. And then I threw the bag of zippers in the trash, along with my dreams of becoming a fashion designer.
I still haven't learned how to sew.
Song of the day: The Bad Touch by Bloodhound Gang
The Genesis Of A Pseudonym
