Forgive me Google, for I have sinned. It's been five months since my last search terms post.
As always, here are some recent interesting/amusing/demented search phrases people have used to get to my site:
my testicles disappeared
Welcome to married life, buddy.
best gift for 2 year old bot
Oil change? An OS upgrade? I love typos.
how to freak out your dad
Here are three options:
1. Tell him you're pregnant.
2. Call him from jail.
3. Call him from jail and tell him you're pregnant.
did deborah harry get a swiffer?
Dude, Deborah Harry was in Blondie! She was a celebrity!
She got a Roomba.
cheryl hines topless
Tell me where!
dane cook makes me change the channel
Me too! And jam pencils in my ears.
i'll strip for you
Go ahead, baby. I'm watching.
If I strip for you will you strip for me?
Wait! I didn't realize this was going to be a reciprocal thing.
taking strippers to baseball games
This would definitely make the 7th inning stretch more interesting.
dust on my testicles
Been a long time, eh?
oobi kills barney
I wish.
if i got a warrant can i still get ssa
No.
my child's father is a moron
What a coincidence! My children's father is a moron, too.
name of the scary organ music that like everyone knows
The Wedding March?
mia hamm's drawbacks
For starters, she married Nomar.
ryan seacrest coughing feverish
Poor thing! Put him to bed. Forever.
where are the latest birthday places to go in maryland for 11th birthday parties in the early spring?
Um, could you be a tad more specific?
miley cyrus deep voice smoker
Motherbumper! You're not the only one who feels this way.
naked tyler hansbrough
Sorry, but I think the dude eats, sleeps, and bathes in his uniform.
preschool show and tell something with bones
Christ! Where do you send your kid? Manson's Happy Kid Korral?
beach boob through chair
Breastfeeding while on vacation sure is a bitch.
show me the forest sex
Jerry Maquire would've been a much better movie had this been Cuba Gooding Jr.'s catchphrase.
most shocking thing on the web
That people read Cynical Dad.
Song of the day: Peek-A-Boo by Siouxsie And The Banshees
Strippers, Testicles, And Ryan Seacrest
