Beating Bill Simmons 2009: Week Three

Cynical Dad NFL Power Index

Here are my top six teams in the NFL:

1. Baltimore Ravens (2-0)
   They'll trounce Cleveland this weekend.
   
   
2. New Orleans Saints (2-0)
   Brees is on pace for 486 touchdown passes this year (slight exaggeration).
   
   
3. New York Jets (2-0)
   I'm in love with this team and their coach.
   
   
4. Minnesota Vikings (2-0)
   Oh no! Favre bent his fingernail! Why wasn't ESPN covering this all week long? You're slipping, guys!
   
   
5. Indianapolis Colts (2-0)
   They've hardly looked dominant in either victory, but they're getting the job done.
   
   
6. New York Giants (2-0)
   See the Indianapolis Colts.

Let's hope I start doing a little better with my picks and/or Bill Simmons comes back down to Earth or it's going to be a L-O-N-G season. Here are my picks for week three (home teams in CAPS, Bill's picks in red):

RAVENS (-13.5) over Browns
This line could be 20 and I'd still lay the points.

Packers (-7) over RAMS
The Packers will be looking to redeem themselves after last week's loss to the Bengals. Besides, the Rams have only scored seven points all season.

Giants (-7) over BUCS
Please FOX, don't show this game on Sunday.

Chiefs (+8.5) over EAGLES
Philadelphia has too many injuries to rout the Chiefs.

LIONS (+6.5) over Redskins
Everyone seems to think the Lions are going to beat the Redskins this weekend. Count me in.

Saints (-6) over BILLS
Only six? Maybe if it was a first-quarter only wager.

Falcons (+4) over PATRIOTS
I think the Patriots will win this game but won't cover.

JETS (-2.5) over Titans
I'm a believer. Plus, the Titans can't stop anyone.

Niners (+7) over VIKINGS
Peterson will fail to get 100 yards rushing for the second week in a row.

TEXANS (-3.5) over Jaguars
Another game I hope isn't televised this weekend.

Bears (-2) over SEAHAWKS
This line should be higher.

Steelers (-4) over BENGALS
Sorry, Cincinnati. You might've beaten the Packers, but I'm still not buying it.

Broncos (-1.5) over RAIDERS
The hardest game for me to pick this weekend. If only Oakland still had Garcia...

Dolphins (+6) over CHARGERS
51 points in two games? What happened to San Diego's defense?

Colts (+1.5) over CARDS
Fun fact: counting last year's playoff game, the Colts have not given up a passing TD in their past four games (and only two passing TDs in their past eight games).

Panthers (+9) over COWBOYS
This is the week the Panthers bounce back! Christ, I'm such a homer.

Last Week

Me: 9-7
Simmons: 13-3

Season

Me: 19-13
Simmons: 24-8

DISCLAIMER: This is provided for entertainment purposes only. If you follow my advice, you are a fool.

Seriously, if you ever spend money based on something I say, have your head examined.