Money Changes Everything

I thought we were friends! Right now, I'm pretty pissed off at you guys.

Ok. Not all of you. Just the ones with older children.

Look. When I stumble upon a parenting tip or trick, I share them with you. I expect the same in return.

So why in the hell hasn't anyone reminded me about the greatest invention in the history of parenting: allowances? I received an allowance as a child but seem to have forgotten about it. I think I lost the brain cells that stored that information during my sophomore year.

We had been trying unsuccessfully to get Zoey to do some chores around the house. Ella decided to bribe reward her with an allowance. Ever since we've mentioned that she'd be earning money, she's jumping at the chance to do her work (and no, I'm not so delusional to think this will last forever.)

Now before you go phoning Child Protective Services, we're only having her do some light housework. Mainly, she just picks up her toys and books and helps me keep everything tidy. We only make her vacuum twice a week. But I can tell you she's one hell of a gutter cleaner.

We pay Zoey $3.41* a week. She thinks it's a million dollars (while she can count, she hasn't learned the value of a dollar yet) and it's more than her Honduran counterparts are earning, so I feel good.

I wonder how much she'd charge to mow the lawn?

*In case you're wondering how we arrived at such an odd amount, 41 cents = 1 quarter + 1 dime + 1 nickel + 1 penny. And three is the magic number. Just ask Stefan.

Song of the day: Shores Of California by The Dresden Dolls