This is the last Halloween post until next October. I promise.
Remember all that stuff I've been writing lately about how much I love Halloween, how it's the greatest holiday ever, and all that crap? I take it all back. Because on Tuesday night, I was seriously hating Halloween.
We took the kids trick-or-treating Tuesday night in our neighborhood. Or at least we tried. Zoey was excited, hoping to score as many Sweet Tarts, lollipops, and other hardcore sugary items (for some reason, she always passes up the chocolate (Note to self: get a DNA test done on her)) as she could carry. Zed, on the other hand, was more interested in every rock, stick, and leaf we passed along the way. Candy? Who needs it when you've got crunchy leaves to crinkle in your fingers?
Two entirely different agendas. So you can imagine how our Halloween went down.
Zed would stand in the middle of someone's yard, picking at their leaves. Zoey would drag one of us by the arm to the front door while complaining that we're not moving fast enough. The other one would pick up Zed. Much kicking, crying, and screaming would ensue. We would try to make small talk with our neighbor, ignoring Zed's screaming and Zoey's whining about wanting to go to the next house. Rinse, lather, repeat. Fun stuff!
So after braving three or four houses, I took Zed home. I stood on the porch and greeted the approximately 46,000 trick-or-treaters that came to our front door. That might sound like an exaggeration, but I firmly believe that's how many people showed up at our front door that evening.
See, we live in a large subdivision. Over 1,500 homes. We have our own elementary school, even. So in addition to having A LOT of children that live in the surrounding area, a lot of kids from other areas come to our neighborhood to trick-or-treat because they can cover a large number of homes in a short period of time.
I don't mind this. What I do mind, however, is when a kid comes up to the porch wearing the same clothes they wore to school that day and carrying a Wal-Mart plastic bag. At least put a little effort into it, you know? I refuse to give candy to these kids. Of course, most of these kids were too old to be trick-or-treating anyway. If you are old enough to drive a car, you shouldn't be trick-or-treating. Go tp someone's house or go pumpkin chunkin' instead.
Even though we bought a shopping cart full of candy, we ran out well before the crowds thinned. We turned off all the lights (which, sadly, didn't stop some kids from ringing our doorbell), put the kids to bed, and watched horror movies for the rest of the evening.
It's The Return Of The Great Halloween Recap, Charlie Brown
