Hi. Welcome to the fist installment of Stuff Only I Care About. Every weekend, I plan to write about a few things that interest me that DO NOT INVOLVE MY CHILDREN.
You've been forewarned.
GN'R LIES
For the past few years, I've felt like we have had a better chance of finding Bigfoot, the Loch Ness Monster, or Osama bin Laden than putting our paws on the long-awaited Chinese Democracy fromMaybe not.
Last weekend, three new Guns N' Roses songs were "leaked." I've had the pleasure of listening to all three and, truth be told, I am unimpressed. I guess my anticipation has been building for so long that the music did not (and could not) meet my expectations. Imagine if you were a kid and Christmas came once every ten years. At this point, Axl Rose could release Pet Sounds vs. The White Album and I would still be unimpressed.
There's a lot that's wrong with the new songs. What's up with the drum loops? Why does The Blues sound like Estranged Part Deux? And why do you have to strain to hear Axl's vocal track? Axl IS Guns N' Roses. Please bring the vocal track up in the final mix, Geffen.
I still hold out hope for the rest of the album. I'll still buy it. But I'm not as excited about it as I once was.
Regardless, I still feel Appetite For Destruction is easily one of the top ten, if not top five, most important/influential albums ever, right up there with It Takes A Nation Of Millions To Hold Us Back, London Calling, Nevermind, Never Mind The Bollocks Here's The Sex Pistols, and Girl You Know It's True.
AND SPEAKING OF THE PISTOLS
In a handwritten note published on their website (which reads as if it was written by my three-year-old daughter), the Sex Pistols announced that they would not be attending this year's Rock And Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony. I'm a bit sad. I would've loved to hear Lydon rage against fellow inductee Lynyrd Skynyrd. And to see him share the same stage as Ozzy. Oh well.SUNDAY MORNING HANGOVER
Here are some of the more interesting/entertaining posts I've come across this week:- Dutch questions his manliness.
- Lucinda creates the world's funniest chain email.
- MetroDad tries to fool a motion sensor in his Vegas minibar.
- Mir details her daughter's disappointment in not winning the Invention Convention (why do I feel I'll be writing the exact same post in three years?).
- Susan dissects the Mommy Wars.
- Weirdgirl reviews the Roomba.
IS THAT A FRUIT ROLL-UP IN YOUR POCKET OR ARE YOU JUST HAPPY TO SEE ME?
Kristen at Motherhood Uncensored is having a contest inspired by some insipid writer. She wants you to send in your funniest pornographic/risqué/sexy line accidentally uttered by you or your child. You can win a MotherDuds t-shirt or 500 Blog Explosion points (sorry, I have no idea what that means). Or if you're the grand prize winner, you get both! I know I'm not the only one who has a child that speaks like a pornstar, so send in your entry!FUN WITH GOOGLE
Here are some recent search terms people have used to get to my site:- preschooler sticking finger in butt
As long as he's sticking it in his own butt, I say don't worry. - father playing trick on son linda blair
I would love to see what this guy has in mind. - dad uses video to scare child
It must have been Barney's Great Adventure. Or Faces of Death. Both are equally terrifying. - The Kind of Dad i want to be
Dude, I am definitely not the kind of dad you want to be.
- stay at home moms makes porno
Susan, this is why you guys aren't winning the Mommy Wars. Or maybe this is why you guys are winning the Mommy Wars.
